Skip navigation

Tag Archives: Parental Skills

 Image result for cyberbully

Information Security:

Methods & Children

&

Overcoming Bullies

Image result for cyberbully

Cyber-bullying is defined as, ” the posting of malicious comments or offensive photos to victimize another on a website, the sending of derogatory texts, or the use of any form of media with the intention to cause harm (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014), has become a fairly common place. Bullying in general is simply a form of abuse and may include neglect, teasing, social isolation, slander, derogatory comments, and even physical or sexual harm (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).

Abuse and neglect often is a blend of a multiplicity of compounds of sexual, physical, verbal, economic and social variables and as such, neglect and abuse has long lasting affects to all properties of development. The long lasting effect of abuse range from dysfunction and distress in cognitive and emotional abilities to behavioral issues and physical ailments (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014). Even feelings of betrayal the inability to form long lasting relationship and negative spiritual consequence such as feeling unloved or abandoned by God and in some cases even concluding that God does not exist are common.

The most effective cure for victims of bullying and betrayal is to aid in the reestablishment of trust and one’s Actualized –identity. The  first step often begins by the expression of empathy, compassion and love in conjunction with meeting unmet needs while help the wounded friend realize, forgive and release without retaliation and then to love past transgressors,  accepting hold-ups and habits and flaws within the other person and self.

Additionally, upon becoming willing the individual should receive the message of the Good News that Jesus is the foundation and Way to Freedom. Thus, it is not a matter of effort or any moral deed that will produce happiness or prosperity and peace or one’s salvation.

After receiving such a revelation. The next step is to instruct the curious and convinced believer in the Gospel. In the process of building -up a Disciple through imitation of action and instruction on spiritual disciplines through modeling and scaffolding the wounded friend learns to walk the path that brings new freedom and reestablishes faith, hope and trust. This allows the individual realization that one’s significance or what we are about and do, and additionally that ones’ security, or whom we belong to and who shall provide and protect us, is found only in our Lord- Jesus Christ.

In our continual growth aided by the Holy Spirit, who comforts and inspires us, and through serving the Father, The Great I Am or that, which is the existence of everything, we trudge through life in worshipful glory in all our thoughts, thinking and actions. Thus, as we attempt to align our will and hearts with his purposes as we serve the various plans as we are called as “Ambassadors of the Kingdom of Heaven” (2 Cor. 5:20:21, 1 Pt. 2 NIV).

While the use of technology and the internet can be, a useful tool for cognitive and social development from early childhood onward (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014) the context must be monitored as well media content to safeguard against predators, bullying and other malicious intent or harm. Most devices have the ability to enable built in content filters, set up secondary log on accounts, and password protect settings based on a recommended age normative rating scale.  Additionally computers, tablets and other devices that have access to the internet should be monitored or the devices may be used in common areas to ease the ability of parents and guardians with the ability in safeguarding children against unwanted activity.

As a former owner of an information technology and security consulting firm I and have training in internet security and various hardware and firmware although it is a bit out of date by current guidelines, as I have switched my professional focus. However, through hacking, spoofing of location, and other means, cameras and one’s own system, network and information may be used against unsuspecting users for the malicious intent or profit and unfortunately, predators often do so frequently in the case of children and youths (Rindoks, 2016)

Thus, Parents should have easy access to the passwords of social media sites, and in addition, the use of third party content filtering software, anti- malware, anti spyware and other security measures should be in place on all devices. Further steps such as disabling or covering of cameras when not in use, checking, and emptying cache and history folders help safeguard privacy of all users (Rindoks, 2016).

Another suggestion is for children never to post their age, physical location, or other demographic information as predators may use such data to target victims. Additionally one should use caution when posting photos. Predators and criminals in general use pictures and other forms of data that reveal location leading to a variety of crimes from burglary to abuse. Thus, in the profile for youths less personal information is always the best policy. Although information security measures are important to safeguard against identity theft and predators it is also easy to become a techno-phobic and overly protect a system resulting in network or computer that does not perform effectively (Rindoks, 2016).

Finally, parents must learn to trust their children and possibly the best policy is to teach awareness and virtues and values coupled with Biblical truth, dignity and above all empathy, compassion and love ( 1 Cor. 13). It is easy to have a desire to overprotect, overindulge, or even over control hose we love. Either out of our own insecurities, our own past issues or fears of harm to self or others in present and future circumstances.

However, true freedom comes in the loving grace and Mercy of Christ and thus, “All anxiety and care should be cast on his loving shoulders” (1 Pt. 5:7). “For if God is for us whom shall we fear” (Ps. 27:1, Rom. 8:31, Heb. 13:6 NIV).

 

In God, Christ and Spirit,

Trent Rindoks

Word Count # 980

 

Image result for whom shall i fearReferences

Martorell, G., Papalia, D. E., & Feldman, R. D. (2014). A Child’s World: Infancy through Adolescence (13th ed.). New York: McGraw Hill Education.

Rindoks, T. (2016). The influence of Media and Young Children. PSYCH 221: Db 4 Reply. TN: Liberty University.

 

Image result for Jesus

 

Advertisements

 Image result for tv and children

The influence of Media and Young Children

The influence media plays in development in youths is a controversial topic. Critics claim that television, video games, social media and the internet can have detrimental effects on emotional, mental, physical and social growth (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).  Advocates of technology cite that media improves motor skills, cognitive awareness and allows children to engage with people of other cultures outside of their society and provides access to a wealth of information beyond the confines of their localized environment. Additionally, critics also claim media increases aggressive behavior and has the potentiality to expose children to vulgar or unsuitable material not appropriate for either their developmental level or moral development.

Furthermore, some parents choice to make television and other technology a surrogate caregiver and in doing so deprive children of nurturing and social interaction that plays a vital role maturation (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).

In regards to potential health risks television and electronic devices emit blue radiation that studies have proven prolonged exposures can cause damage to the eyes and disturb sleep. It is wise either to limit the time spent using such devices or to take frequent breaks when using devices to curb such effects and to not sleep with television or computer monitors on. Additionally, people who engage in excessive use of technology and do not have a regular fitness plan or engage in physical activity are prone to obesity, coronary disease, a higher degree of stress and a host of complications depending on the risk factors of each individual and the influence of genetics and association of environment hazards.

While video games improve motor skills and cognitive awareness in children over the age of three (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014), certain content may increase aggressive behavior depending on stress level and temperament and prolonged exposure can decrease social interaction skills.

Additionally, prolonged exposure can limit cognitive development and memory skills. Studies have found a dependency on media has caused the average concentration rate to drop to around 6-8 seconds because of media in most people. In addition, a decline in literacy rates and syntax errors in speech and writing may be the result of texting and social media.

Sexual predation and bullying are often first initiated over social media and the internet. However, predators in general will seek out children in any environment frequented by this group. Thus, in the case of media the best safeguards is to have access to passwords, to use content filters, and check the posts and interactions of youths to protect from unwanted activity. Most, televisions and audio visional equipment are equipped with content filters and password protection for settings. Additionally, computers, cellphones and tablets should be protected with content filtering software, anti malware protection, password protection and if the devices are in the bedroom of youths cameras should be disabled or covered up with electrical tape when not in use to stop from unwanted spying as these accessories can be enabled remotely by hacking.

How much is too much media time?  After conducting a review of the effects of media, “The American Pediatric Committee on Public Education discourages the use of television by any child under the age of two, rather the committee encourages in cognitive and social activities such as talking, sing, and reading (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).”  The data found toddlers spend an average of approximately of 2 hours watching television alone. Yet Youths in general spend more time engaged in the use of media than sleeping spending between 6-9 hours fixated with technological devices. The average child should sleep about hours a day, attend school for approximately 8 hours and engage in physical activity or exercise for about an hour a day. Furthermore, all people benefit from positive social interaction or quality time of approximately 3 hours a day and additionally children’s time will be spent on completing homework and helping with family chores for about hours daily, this would only leave 2 hours for media related endeavors. Granted time management and the amount of sleep could allow for an increase in media time as well as the time spent exercising may be decreased to around 30-45 minutes; however, the time spent for media engagement would still be approximately hours.

Does media have a positive or negative correlation in development? The correlation depends on the frequency of exposure, the type of content, the temperament and personality of the individual as well as how the family interacts and perceives media in general.

A further suggest is to use all forms of media as an educational tool and a form of group dynamic model. By including the whole family in the media education process and using the same methods one would use when reading such as, “introducing the theme and asking follow-up questions, encouraging the participants to explore the depth of the content matter,  and/or describing the relevancy to one’s own thoughts, feeling action, situation or circumstances.  Finally, discuss any social values and Virtues, or Spiritual truth, gained in the message. Knowledge and wisdom can be gained that will lead to growth through the media experience. Additionally, this fosters development of listening and communication skills as well as cognitive and social development (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).”

Although, individuals possess innately unique abilities, traits, and talents and learn at a different duration and frequency.  Most cognitive, emotional, social, physical and spiritual development occurs within a normative range. The theories of Piaget, Erikson, and those of Vygotsky are considered as baseline by some and questioned by others; observation of children and people in general couple with one’s own experience as well as Biblical Scripture confirms that life develops in stages (Eccl 3) (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014). Yet, Life also is an ongoing process (Ps 51, Rom 3-8, Rev 20).

What is most evident from all studies conducted is prolonged exposure poses significant risk to physical, cognitive, emotional and social development and detracts from social interaction and nurturing (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).  Both nurturing and social engagement coupled with genetics form the cohesive bond of necessity in maturation in all stages of development and through ones temporal lifespan as we trudge the road toward the Narrow Gate toward Eternity with and in Oneness with our Creator.

“He changes times and seasons; he deposes kings and raises up others. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning (Dan 2: 21 NIV).” Thus, God, initiates maturation, and eliminates bullies and Authoritarians, bullies and those whom to bring discord to society. This is done so by the Gift of Wisdom and Knowledge given to the mature and wise people who know and teach his ways. These parents, mentors, and leaders pass down experience, knowledge and wisdom to the children and students of future generations for the purpose of his discerning virtue and truth and the prosperity of all people and the fulfillment of God’s Divine Purpose through his various plans for each person given in stages throughout all Eternity and our life cycle within creation.

In God, Christ and Spirit,

Trent Rindoks

Word Count # 1126

Image result for tv and children

References

Martorell, G., Papalia, D. E., & Feldman, R. D. (2014). A Child’s World: Infancy through Adolescence (13th ed.). New York: McGraw Hill Education.

Related image

Image result for tv and children

 Image result for jesus and children painting

Image result for 10 commandments

A Biblical Perspective on Parental Relationships

In Deuteronomy 4, the focus is the obedience and teaching of the commands of God to one’s family and within society. Deuteronomy 6 focus on Loving God and proclaiming the Blessing giving by him to others so all people may come to know, worship, serve, and glorify him.  In correlation, both passages form the basis of moral and legal truth.

In Deuteronomy 4:1-9 God commands his people to obey his laws for in doing so will yield the fruits of his spirit or virtue and provide wisdom and understanding allowing Israel to be a beacon of hope and a blessing to all ethos or people and attract others to “The Way and Truth of God.”  Furthermore, this is to be done so in a communal and discipline fashion using communication and meditation and without cohesion a blessed gift to be given only to those who wish to receive it. However, it is the parents’ responsibility to equip (scaffold-teach) and through righteous living transmit (model) the children the ways of the Law (recorded directive of conduct) and Virtues of God (Morality/ mannerism of heart).

Deuteronomy 6: 4- 9 deals with the principle of teaching morality and conduct. Simply stated, God commands parents to teach and communicate his commands and the Way of Love of all things through righteous living. This is an active -reactive process of obedience of living in and by faith as a love servant of God is for his Glory to all things and all things.  God’s Sovereign, inclusive -redemptive plan for all creation and all humanity. This plan of justification and restoration is available to all who wishes to choose to follow and live under his guidance and authority receiving the gift of total transformation from death and freedom from the bondage of the slavery sin and the consequence of depravity, suffering, and hostility.

The Commandments, or the directives of God, form the foundational framework to illuminate and educate all people in matters of ethical conduct both personally and in society to a standard that is equivocal to the Virtues or nature of God himself and thus forms the basis of decency and morality. This Moral code’s capstone is in unity and love. First love and trust in and to God. Then to everyone else regardless of any belief, ethnicity, of and variable of culture. Certain immoral actions were considered unlawful under Judaic Law and thus, under such a system of belief, originally works and/or deed alone determined the fate for all humanity.

However, freedom, decency and morality is in part achieved through the active- reactive process of mutual compromise, forgiveness and repentance which was and is done under the guidance and direction of mentors and counselors but additionally must be accomplished by the inter-working of faith and the Holy Spirit.

Furthermore, only by Jesus’ gracious and merciful atonement on The Jesse Tree and his Resurrection- Ascension all are reconciled and justified as citizens of Heaven and become children of equivocal status, significant worth and distinction once one is given Freedom in Christ (Gal 5). This choice is always subjective to the process of faith that forms in the individual becoming curious, then convince and finally committed that the Penalty of Sin is Death and the Way of the Spirit is the only means of living.

The Way, or path of truth , Christ-mindedness and  Christian Living ( Phil 1-6, Rom 12-15) can best be qualified as an active yet reactive  process of modeling of moral action and the use of teaching through scaffolding, Operant Learning and Socio-cognitive methodologies  and many other learning theories coupled with nurturing or the expression of love (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).

In regards to the role of each respective parent both play a part in nurturing and equipping a Child throughout life. Yet, the role of each is often unique and varies from culture to culture and even among subcultures within people groups of similar societies and nations.

Additionally the environment including every person we interact with as well as our own views influence development of our temperament, disposition, worldview and every aspect of development with possibly a few exemptions such as our God given innate personality and certain biological aspects( Ps. 139) that cannot be modified (Martorell, Papalia, & Feldman, 2014).

Thus, although we as People are create similarly we also all are unique. All people are made in the Image of God and called to be in a relationship with him and additionally to serve him as mangers as contributors and innovators of the Earth (Gen 1). All of creation was formed before Time- Space and our Biosphere existed and thus, was fashioned in the secret or Holy Place of Heaven (Ps. 139). Furthermore, all knowledge is inspired by God and existed with God before time began (Ps. 139, 2 Tim. 3:16).

Finally, God’s Plan is to redeem all Humanity from our self-centered driven intentions, actions and desires which leads towards a wretched sinful nature and our separation from God or death. In the process of sanctified –faith and grace in holiness  God restores us all to our Glorified Likeness of Christ and ends the pang of all creation that currently is in reaction to the plight of Mankind’s’ sin.

One may endure a certain degree of hardship for the world is currently hostile towards our sinful nature. We wait and serve with hope in blessed assurance for Messiah’s returns and reigns as King over Heaven and Earth or until our temporal resurrected awaiting our restoration as Spirits in Heaven. For this is dependent on which ever may come to pass in the coming ages. For all that is certain is That Jesus is always near, change is inevitable, and at times growth is painful. Thus, we preserve with courage, faith love and joy preparing the way for the return of our Savior-King as Ambassadors and Loving Bond-servants of Christ.

In God, Christ and Spirit,

Trent Rindoks

Word Count #987

 

Image result for Morality

References

Martorell, G., Papalia, D. E., & Feldman, R. D. (2014). A Child’s World: Infancy through Adolescence (13th ed.). New York: McGraw Hill Education.

Image result for trinity

Image result for freedom from bondage quote

%d bloggers like this: